No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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