I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Randomize
