This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
