I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Randomize
