just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Randomize
