There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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