break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
