yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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