my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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