brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
