I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
