i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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