I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
