Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
