Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
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