Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
