he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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