i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Dear god my vagina.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
