last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
it's not cheating when I paid for it
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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