Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
