Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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