tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize