He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I wish I only lived at night.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
