She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
