I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Randomize
