According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
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