I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Randomize
