3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Randomize
