Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
