K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
