They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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