I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I understand Curling. That high.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
