Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Randomize
