True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
