Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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