How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
