Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
