i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
