Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
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