i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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