scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
Randomize
