i'm signing you up for texting rehab
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
