His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
