it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
