one might say we're banned from that church
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
