You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
