garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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