Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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