I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
