The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
